Ok friends, this is the real deal. This is THE book to buy for yourself for those loooooong in the trenches days of parenthood when you desperately need some humor. This is also THE book to give as a gift to another parent—a parent also in the throes of it all, or someone who is about to be a parent (Ha! Guess what’s coming?!) and even a veteran parent whose kids are grown and gone and needs a reminder of how hilarious (and scientific!) it all was.
Science of Parenthood: Thoroughly Unscientific Explanations for Utterly Baffling Parenting Situations by Norine Dworkin-McDaniel and Jessica Ziegler is in its own category. Humor, science, stories, cartoons… There is no other book like it. You will learn such definitions as
Newton’s Third Law of (E)motion:
And this handy chart to help you predict when your kid will poop:
Because these are things we need to know, as parents or soon to be parents.
You will also enjoy hilarious and very relatable stories of parenthood, such as
“Approximately Three Minutes Inside a Busy Mom’s Head”:
Just what I need, Susan with her effing PTO clipboard. Effing sanctimonious bit— “Hey Susan!” (Rolls down window) “I’m good. How’s your daughter? Four dozen? Chocolate chip? Sure, Susan! Count on me.” DAMN! Now I’m stuck baking cookies. Still, cookies do sound good. I bet the Girl Scouts are still at the grocery store. THIN MINTS!
And “The Modern Parent’s Dinner Devolution”, which breaks down the 9 stages of decline in Mommy’s diet:
From Stage 1: Nutritious, home-cooked meal made with ethically raised locavore meats, sustainable whole grains, and organic produce bought daily at the farmer’s market…
…to Stage 9: Stale pretzel stix, string cheese, and stray raisins scrounged from the bottom of a kid’s backpack because you’ve been stuck on shuttle duty since 7 a.m.
How did this hilarity come to be in book form? Authors Norine and Jessica tell their story:
Science of Parenthood started nearly three years ago as an illustrated humor blog. We use fake math and science to “explain” the stuff that puzzles parents every day. Things like …
Why are broken cookies “ruined?”
Why does it matter what color the sippy cup is?
Why can’t you put the straw in the juice box without your kid having a melt down?
Why will a kid whine-whine-whine for a toy, then lose all interest in that toy once they have it?
Where the eff is my phone?
Divided into four sections–biology, chemistry, physics and mathematics–the book lives in the chasm that exists between our collective hopes and dreams and expectations of what parenting will be like … and the brutal, slap-you-upside-the-head reality of what parenting actually is. We cover all aspects of pregnancy, birth and the hilarious frustrations that come with early childhood (tantrums, picky eating, diaper blowouts, illness, sleep issues, play dates, toy creep, homework battles and encounters with crazy parents (not you, of course, we mean other parents). And you know what? You don’t even need to be a scientist to “get” it.
They are not kidding, y’all. This book is not about science. But it is damn funny. You will laugh and see yourself in these stories if you’ve been a parent for at least 25 minutes.
Where can readers find Science of Parenthood? On Amazon and bookstores such as Barnes and Noble.
And you can always find Science of Parenthood on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram.
About the Authors:
Norine is the primary writer for Science of Parenthood, the blog, and Science of Parenthood, the book. A longtime freelance magazine writer, Norine’s articles have appeared in just about every women’s magazine you can buy at supermarket checkout as well as on The Huffington Post, Parenting.com, iVillage, Lifescript and Scary Mommy websites. Norine is the co-author of You Know He’s a Keeper…You Know He’s a Loser: Happy Endings and Horror Stories from Real Life Relationships (Perigee), Food Cures (Reader’s Digest) and a contributor to several humor anthologies, including Have Milk, Will Travel: Adventures in Breastfeeding (Demeter Press). She lives with her husband and 9-year-old son in Orlando.
The daughter of famed New Yorker cartoonist Jack Ziegler, Jessica is Science of Parenthood’s co-creator, illustrator, web designer and contributing writer. In her “off hours,” Jessica is the director of social web design for VestorLogic and the writer/illustrator of StoryTots, a series of customizable children’s books. Her writing and illustration have been published on The Huffington Post, Vegas.com, InThePowderRoom.com and in Las Vegas Life and Las Vegas Weekly. Jessica was named a 2014 Humor Voice of the Year by BlogHer/SheKnows Media. She lives with her husband and 11-year-old son in Denver.
Together Jessica and Norine published The Big Book of Parenting Tweets and The Bigger Book of Parenting Tweets earlier in 2015.
If you would like Norine and Jessica to visit your book group, contact Norine at norine@scienceofparenthood.
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*I received an advanced copy of this book for review. I was also invited to a book launch party, where I was able to spray boogie wipes wrinkle remover on my face and spray stuff up my nose (#boogiewipestour). Here’s me hanging out with the hilarious Jessica Ziegler as well as talented author Becky Blades and some other lady who showed up named Jen Mann (you may have heard of her and one—or 11—of her books too.)
Want to see if Norine and Jessica are coming to a city near you so you can get a signed book and also spray Boogie Wipes mist up your nose? Check out the tour schedule here!