The 21st Century SAHM

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things (A Book Review)

October 21, 2016

Parenting. Marriage. Madness. An accurate byline for this book, that goes into the real ugly, yet beautiful truths about parenthood.

In a sea of books that fall within the “parenthood humor” category, this one stands out. This is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things is the perfect title for a book about the chaos, the exhaustion, and the beauty of parenthood. Written from dad’s perspective, Clint Edwards truly has been on both sides of the fence—he’s been the breadwinner, gone all day, wondering why in the hell his wife let the house (and herself at times) go. Then he was the stay-at-home parent. And he said, “Ohhh. I get it now.”

It’s all in here—financial struggles, jealousy over his kids liking their mom more than him, and the ugly truth of how kids can rip a marriage apart if it’s not nurtured. But the best part of Clint’s book is that he confesses to messing up. A LOT. But he sees it. Owns it. And learns from it. I don’t know any perfect parents, but I do know a lot who pretend to be. And who judge those of us who are far from it. So it’s joyously refreshing to read about another parent screwing up. Because shit if parenthood isn’t hard. And full of screw-ups. But it’s far less lonely when you know others are in your same boat.

One of my favorite essays is the title essay: “This is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things.” It is about ridiculously disgusting things we all do as parents—things that 20-somethings without kids (how we used to be) are appalled to hear. Things like Continue Reading

The Winds Are Changing: A Letter to My 1st Grade Son

The 21st Century SAHM

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September 8, 2016

I am struggling to let you grow up. I am struggling to get you go. But I'm also so proud of the boy you are growing up to be.

Dear 6-year old son,

Something is happening, between you and me. The winds are changing. I can feel it—this inevitable, this impending thing called growing up that you appear committed to. I see it in your face at night, when I check on you while you are asleep. You look so much older all of a sudden. And your long legs take up so much more of your bed now. You’ve taken to talking back here and there. I think I saw an eye-roll the other day in response to a lecture from me.

You’ve been a bit down-trodden lately. You are missing your daddy who has been out of town for work. Another kid picked on you the other day and it upset you. You sat in tears at the dinner table telling me how your feelings were hurt, and I didn’t know what to say. So last night, after you and your siblings went to bed, I decided I’d surprise you. After I brought your sister and brother to preschool today, I arrived at your school to have a special lunch next to you in the cafeteria. I know there are only a few years where moms are allowed (by their kids) to sit on those benches, amidst rows of lunch trays full of Continue Reading

One Mother to Another (Why Melissa Mowry is My New BFF)

The 21st Century SAHM

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August 14, 2016

In a sea of parenting books, this is THE ONE for a new mom in the trenches with babies and toddlers who desperately needs a laugh and a lifeline.

The market is saturated with parenting books—we all know that. So when a new book about the woes of motherhood debuts, you might wonder if it will offer a different perspective. We’ve all written about potty-training a million times. We talk about our wine glasses getting a little bit fuller all the time. I know, because I do it too.

I offered to read and review Melissa Mowry’s One Mother to Another: This is Just Between Us for a few reasons. I have been a fan and follower of Melissa’s blog One Mother to Another for a while, and I love her voice. So as a fellow writer (and mother) I wanted to support her. I also was genuinely interested in what angle she took—how she would differentiate her work from every other motherhood book on the shelf. And finally, I like when people give me free stuff. Especially stuff I really want. So I offered to review her book if she would send me a copy. Which she did. (There’s my disclaimer!)

So here’s the truth. This is why Melissa’s book is a success and how it is different from other books on the shelves in the Continue Reading